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April 28, 2011
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Chapter 9


Hundreds of miles away from the land of Equestria was a dark and lifeless land, nothing but dirt and ash blowing around by the wind in the air. The rocky terrains were jagged, and the air was cold as death. It was the land where the dark army was formed. Underneath the land was the lair of fire. There lurked an evil warlock who was responsible for the destruction of towns and for the many deaths of innocent stallions, mares, colts and fillies; Tartarus, a vicious lizard with hard green and black scales, long razor sharp teeth, and bright red and yellow eyes, the creator of the army. He wore armor underneath his dark cloak. In the lair, he slowly waved his arms around a floating glowing orb. Dark streams of mist swirled around them as he began to speak in incantations of a dark language, only to be learned through dark magic. Whispering the words, he looked into the orb and saw the land of Equestria.

"Find them…" Tartarus whispered in a dark hissing voice. "Find the survivors who defeated my warriors…"

The orb glowed and then faded, revealing an image of Yorkshire walking back to the barn.

"One of them…" he said to himself. He was suddenly filled with rage looking at the smiling knight. He slashed the orb with his sharp claws in a loud screech, making it disappear into mist. He turned away and walked to his rock throne. He sat down and growled quietly. "How could a bunch of four legged creatures defeat my army of warriors…?" he asked himself. "My soldiers had everything… They had strength, speed, lust for innocent blood… I used up all of my magic to attempt to take over Equestria. Now I am weak." he stood up from his throne and walked around with many thoughts in his head. "I will not be made a fool… I will not tolerate this defeat!" he walked over to a large pit of spewing fire and stood over it looking down. "I will soon regain all of my powers. When I do, I will once again try to take over the land they call Equestria. All of the ponies will be under my command, no where to run, no where to hide. The land will soon be dark and dead. But first, I need those knights out of the way." he said. He walked around the pit of fire thinking out loud. "I could kill them myself, but I would be endangering my identity. I could send a couple of new warriors to do the job, but that would bring out suspicion from the citizens…" he thought and thought for minutes. He suddenly snapped his fingers, hatching an idea and grinned. "Everyone has a weakness. All I need to do is find a weakness from a couple of the knights and use it against them. But what are their weaknesses?" he pressed his hands together, closing his eyes. He moved them apart from each other creating a small glow in between his hands, beginning to whisper the dark language again.

The glow grew bigger, turning into another bright orb.

"Show me…" he whispered to the orb. "Show me the knights and the ones who have the weakest links."

The orb revealed all of the knights resting in the barn. It then showed two images of Knighton and Yorkshire next, revealing them to have the strongest weaknesses.

Tartarus grinned and chuckled viciously. "Good, good." he said to the orb. "Now then, show me their weaknesses… show me what they fear or care about the most."

The orb glowed once again. The glowing faded, revealing a yellow coated Pegasus mare and a unicorn Pegasus mare with a dark purple coat both sleeping in their own beds in their homes.

He laughed quietly revealing his teeth. "So… their loves for these mares are their weaknesses." he said. He clamped his hands together making the orb disappear in mist. "All I have to do is to get my claws on those mares, bring them here and use them as bait. That will then lure the knights to come here. After that…" he slid his finger across his throat showing a sign of death. "Once the knights are out of the way, I will wait for my full powers to return and create a much bigger and stronger army! And then…  Equestria will be mine…"
Chapter 9 of my My Little Pony fanfic. Warning, this is a short chapter.

The introduction of the antagonist of the story. The one who was responsible for the dark army. What will he be planning next?

Chapter 8: [link]

Chapter 10: [link]

MLP: FiM (c) Lauren Faust
Writing, Yorkshire and knights (c) Dandric101
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:iconjozilla877:
Jozilla877 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2012
This is a great villian! He has such a diverse personality with half of it being dark, menacing, pshycotic and wise while the other is loud, cartoony and boastful. This combined personality really works with this story and it's over all quality.
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Really?! Thanks!
Reply
:iconjozilla877:
Jozilla877 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2012
I cant wait to see more of this guy!
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Read more of the story then ^^
Reply
:iconjozilla877:
Jozilla877 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2012
I'm already on part 12! bytheway what lizard is Tartarus?
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
The lizard warlock is named Tartarus. But this story was written BEFORE MLP made Tartarus as a real place in Equestria.
Reply
:iconjozilla877:
Jozilla877 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2012
I also take it that this was made before the episode where they went to the gala!?
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Yes! This was before season 1 ended.
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconjaffaarchfiend:
Jaffaarchfiend Featured By Owner May 3, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Haven't read past this chapter yet....but somehow I don't think trying to kidnap the Princess and Fluttershy is going to be as easy as this guy thinks it will be...

To the Moon!

And, the Stare!
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner May 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
We'll have to see then.
Reply
:icontoadlink:
ToadLink Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2011
Aww come on what happened to the lovey dovey stuff. Well I guess you would need an epic plot twist in a story like this.
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
This plot twist will be epic!
Reply
:icontoadlink:
ToadLink Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2011
True that my friend.
Reply
:iconhavoc777:
HAVOC777 Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2011
this is a GREAT story.
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you very much!
Reply
:iconhavoc777:
HAVOC777 Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2011
U R very welcome. :)
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
How do you like chapter 9?
Reply
:iconhavoc777:
HAVOC777 Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2011
All I can say is things are about to get more interesting.
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah! ^^
Reply
:iconhavoc777:
HAVOC777 Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2011
:D
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
C:
Reply
:iconsalohcin-silverwing:
Salohcin-Silverwing Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Student Writer
:iconsauronplz: :iconsaysplz: Soon, soon, I will have the Ring in my possiession, and all of Middle Earth will be-

:icontwilightsparkleplz: AHEM! Don't you mean Equestria? :iconfluttershystareplz:

:iconsauronplz: sorry. Wrong story. ^^;

Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
XD I'm guessing you like the chapter? ^^
Reply
:iconsalohcin-silverwing:
Salohcin-Silverwing Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Student Writer
it was shorter than usual, but I can't complain about that, seeing this chapter is probably the average length for most of my stories
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah, so what do you think of the plot of chapter 9?
Reply
:iconsalohcin-silverwing:
Salohcin-Silverwing Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Student Writer
what more is there to say?

you have an evil lizard warlock, planning revenge and getting ready for a good-old-fashioned kidnapping.
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Okay.
Reply
:iconsalohcin-silverwing:
Salohcin-Silverwing Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Student Writer
don't worry about it so much, dude. Just enjoy writing it
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm not worried.
Reply
:iconnova225:
Nova225 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011
Hum.

So... it wasn't just a random army of a random kingdom that went crazy, after all...
But, in fact, an evil *Dark Sorcerer* using his the ''sum of his magic power'' to create a military force to achieve his goal?

...well, that sounds better already. :nod:
Read a lot of those adventure books (like : Forgotten Realm and Dragonlance), where an arch-mage of great power follows a dangerous (and usually forbidden) way to gather even more power, then become (more) evil and/or corrupted and decide to make his personal army to take over a kingdom (if it wasn't already his plan all along).

For Fluttershy, she might be ''attackable'' directly, yeah, more than with Luna that's for sure. For Luna, Princess-Alicorn-Powerful magic user, he would have to use a more subtle and corruptive approach, maybe similar to the whole Nightmare Moon scenario.
-My thoughts on that.

You know, you could almost place a '' - The End - '' there, and make the rest of the series, well, an individual series on its own, really.
Basicly... this would change NOTHING at all ;) ...except that you would be able to give that ''Continuation'' series, its personal Title ;).
If there's like a couple more chapters, if you decide to go over the Sorcerer guy and all that, like another 5-6(moar?) chapters... It might be a good idea to do that. It would give some ''breath space'' to the readers, I think, like making a Season 1 and Season 2 for TV shows or something ;).
-Just an idea.
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:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I will know when it will be time to end the series.
Reply
:iconpaprika1:
Paprika1 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011
nice
Reply
:icondandric101:
Dandric101 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
He's gonna be the antagonist
Reply
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